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Ohh Womaniya: Feminism Or Sexism? Your choice!

The latest Vogue video starring Deepika  Padukone has already created some upheaval in the social media and why it should not?  After all it talks about one of the most sensitive and important subject in the country .As our honorable leader of opposition Mr.Rahul Gandhi says
“Our prime Concern is women empowerment”

Since time immemorial, various civilizations across the world have  treated women as the weaker sex. From Chinese binding women’s feet to judge their beauty in 10th century to a super girl Malala Yousufzai being brutalized in  21st century  for education. Women have seen the worst times.

I personally believe that human emotions are like a mechanical spring. “The external force might succeed in suppressing it for some time, but as soon as the spring gets a chance, it will bounce back and it will bounce back really hard and strong in an uncontrolled manner”

The modern women have started fighting for her rights and freedom and this is one of the brightest omens that we can witness today. But there is a fine difference that separates empowerment and armament.

When there are two lines of different lengths. There are two way to make the shorter one equal to the longer one.

First way is to address and fight for real issues like domestic violence against women, a girl’s right to choose and pursue her dream career, give her freedom to choose her life partner and having an equal say to come out of a toxic relationship with dignity, equal opportunity to rise at workplace based on skill and many more issues under the sun. It slowly but surely increases the length of the shorter line. This is empowerment or feminism for me. It can be worked out and accomplished mutually by both the sexes. It will help both the sexes develop mutual respect and love for each other.
The second way is to go out and blatantly shout “It’s my way or the highway”. I will oppose anything and everything that this stereotype patriarchal society opposes in  order to establish my superiority and satisfy my false womanly ego. A fake freedom to prove that a woman also has the same rights to commit the same  mistakes or sins that a man does. It shortens the longer line. This is sexism for me. It might promote equality but it will surely lead to a chaotic and unstable society. A society with mutual hatred and competitiveness.

Its Your Choice to choose which way you want to promote and achieve equality.


1.Its Your Choice to wear whatever you want
But I would personally choose not to wear a pair of my football shorts to my office because I feel it’s always decent to dress according to the occasion and the crowd until the crowd has slowly evolved enough over the years to accept the change. I would rather choose to dress classic and look suave than be raunchy.

2.It’s your choice to be size zero or size 15
But rather than flashing my bones or my beer belly I would rather choose to have a healthy body. Being healthy never hurts.

3.It’s your choice to have sex before the  marriage or outside the marriage.
But I would personally choose to be loyal with someone whom I have vowed to be my life partner.I wont cheat on you because I know it will hurt me if you cheat on me.

4.It’s your choice to love temporarily or lust forever.
But I never met anyone who fell in love with someone with an intention to love temporarily, neither did I. Although the flames may smother down with time due to incompatibility, but you never chose to love temporarily, it just happened.
To lust forever???  Yes its your choice, but I am not really sure whether it will be your choice if you end up in a psychiatrist’s clinic, a sex rehabilitation center or in worst cases behind the bars.

5. It’s your choice to love a man or woman or both.
Nobody has a choice in it. It’s something as natural as being a left handed or right handed person. Just be mature enough to not hurt someone’s unconventional love inclinations.

6.Its your choice to come home at 4 in the morning.
Yes it is again your choice. But being a brother, father, friend or a lover, I will always be worried about your safety until unless I am assured that you are in a safe environment.

7. It’s your choice to have my baby or not
My 10th standard biology teacher taught me that sexual reproduction of human beings requires two opposite genders, so my common sense tells me that the decision to raise a baby or not should also involve both the people. Grammatically speaking, it’s not “your” baby, it should be our baby.

8. Your pleasure may be my pain; it’s still your choice
But as a human, if I know something that I do will cause you pain, I will choose not to do it or at least try my best to not rub your wounds. But again it’s still your choice.

Spider man 3 last Quote
“Whatever comes our way, whatever battle we have raging inside us, we always have a choice. My friend Harry taught me that. He chose to be the best of himself. It's the choices that make us who we are, and we can always choose to do what's right.”

Well to conclude, I know it still ain't the best time and women empowerment has to go a long way. But trust me, Chivalry ain't dead. There are still many gentlemen in the society, I have met a few and would love to be like them.  Blaming every man won’t help the cause.
“It’s not a war of superiority, it’s a revolution for equality”



Rendezvous with the God -Ganesh Chaturthi at Pune

Chapter 1:The Beginning

It would have been just another day for me if I was in Delhi or Chennai but I was in Pune, cultural capital of Maharashtra and to skip Ganesh Chaturthi celebrations would have been a sin.So after a lull morning, I decided to put on my traveling shoes and head towards Dagdusheth mandir.One of the most revered Ganesha shrine at Pune and the one which was bombed most recently.
I stepped out to explore the city. I walked steadily to my destination. It was drizzling at a lousy rate, but the exuberance everywhere outweighed it. The entire city was draped in Ganesha celebration .Kids and women dressed in traditional clothes, men wore white ganpati caps .Speakers shrieked praises to lord at high decibels. Every nook and corner of the city installed Ganesha altars. Swarm of devotees engrossed in singing and dancing to the Dhol beats.

“Moriyaa moriyaa moriyaa ho..bappaa moriyaa….” .And then some more -“Moriyaa moriyaa moriyaa ho..bappaa moriyaa….” Continues and fades….

The atmosphere was euphoric.

Chapter 2:The journey

 I walked further and reached Kasba pet. Another famous Ganpati mandir.It was surround by a dozen of  pandals showcasing myriad of ganesha idols in different sizes and forms. Ganesha as Krishna,ganesha as Sai and budhaa and many other avatars and postures.
I am yet to figure out whether it was just a marketing gimmick or a message that God is one.

More I walked towards my destination, density of flesh and bones grew larger and larger.Reminded me of Chandini chowk at delhi and Mamblam at Chennai.No doubt we are steadfastly moving to become most populous human species in the world.

Closeby,A Ganesha altar was being carried to its destination, surrounding it were few men and women,dressed in white with saffron bands dancing their heart out with the dhol beats. The beats were loud and strong. A dark moustached man with intense look started raising a long double triangular saffron flag. With every inch advance of flag,drum and dhol beats  flared up. Louder and stronger.

“Dham dham dham dhoo. Dhamm dhamm dhammm dhoo”
Louder and stronger! Louder and stronger!

“Dhammmm dhaammm dhammm dhammmm dhammmmm”

It was a war cry. As if the great Shivaji with a blood red tilak on his forehead was preparing to walk out for a war. As if he was unleashing his lions for the battle. Adrenaline rushed, with an imaginary sword at my hand, I felt like a warrior. The Maratha warrior.

Chapter 3: The Darshan

The warrior inside me braved the crowd and moved towards my destination. I could see the tech savvy souls clicking Ganesha pictures before their eyes could capture it.

 “Moriyaa moriyaa moriyaa ho..bappaa moriyaa….”

Slowly and effortlessly, with the crowd I moved towards the idol.A 12 x 8 feet, larger than life elephant god’s idol placed in huge altar dressed opulently with silk and gold. Yellow light illuminating from all directions creating a halo effect. Mouse,modaks and muse at his feet. Calm yet powerful look on the face.
Before I could make a wish or offer a prayer, I was thrown out of the epicentre. 

Chapter 4: The WTF!

I was greeted by smells of vadapavs,lassi and modaks.But it was intriguing to find another crowd of men,gathered at a single shop.
It read:

Ganpati Lottery store (Maharshtra government authorised)

It looked like Indian version of casino. People with meagre wages and high gambling instincts gathered to play Matka.A table with images named Gaay,geend,surya etc etc.people placed their 10rs bets on the object.Lucky one stole the show.
There were lottery tickets as well. A guy with burdened look on his face said to sky

“ganpati bappa,iss baar lottery laga dena”.

Then to the vendor

“Teen 20-20 ke tickets de re..Do Maharshtra ke aur ek Sikkim ka”
After he finished his ritual, I went to him asked: - “Bhia isme kabhi kisi ka lottery lagta bhi hain??
He said:- Aee chicknee tu in sab se duur reh re..ENJOY LIFE! ENJOY!!

And he rushed away on his bajaj scooter with the golden tip.

(Fading voice) “Moriyaa moriyaa moriyaa ho..bappaa moriyaa….”

With some time to spare ,I walked a few steps away and asked a Ganpati cap seller
“Bhia ye shanivar vaada fort aaj khulla hua hain kya??
He replied “Haa.Khulaa hua hain 5 Baje tak.Par kya karoge jaake??
I enquired “kyu bhia..?? Fort dekhunga”
 He asked “Tumharee saath mein bandi hain kya??”
I said  “Nahi…”
He replied “ To faydaa nahi hain, baaki couples ko bhi disturb karoge aur unhe dekhkar khud bhi disturb hoge”.
Tu kaha se hain?? Teri awaaz se Pune ka nahi lagta,isliye tujhe advice diya,nahi to main Marathi logo ko nahi deta.
I said, “Main delhi se hu”

 God, gambling, racism, aggression and lovemaking co-existed in hundred meters of radius.

Chapter 5: The Enlightenment

As I walked away, I came across an old building with a runty single room house at the ground floor with tattered walls, rain water gushing inside .It was jam packed with a steel almirah , a single bed ,a stove and a newly bought clay Ganesha idol.
They were praying exuberantly with vigor. The house had as less space as a mouse hole , a small girl even stood outside the house to pray. Still they looked happy and satisfied.
It rained heavily. Shell shocked, perplexed, I was there for a long time. What has God given to them? Why are they still believers? Why do they spend a chunk of their earnings in prayers?
Sometimes god is neither found in the holiest shrines, nor he is found in richest households. he is sometimes found within the hearts of humble unattached souls.
He is found in the form of hope that tomorrow will be a better day.
When you possess nothing, he is a possession.
When nobody cares about your existence, he is a belief that at least your creator is bothered.
He is found in the form of a friend, with whom you can share your deepest troubles.
He is found in the form of love that unites you with your loved ones.
He is also found in the form of forgiveness for the wrongdoings that the world has done unto you and in the form of repentance for your mistakes.
He is also found in the form of gratitude, for whatever little you possess.

I thanked Ganesha idol in the small house and moved on !

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